Punctuation Problems: Breaks

There is a set of punctuation marks that are used to separate thoughts in writing, which I like to refer to as Breaking Punctuation. They are the comma ( , ), the em dash ( — ), the semicolon ( ; ), the colon ( : ), parentheses ( ), and the period ( . ). Each of these has a subtly different meaning from the others, which we’re going to break down here.

The Period

The period is the ultimate and strongest form of breaking punctuation, which is why it’s known as a “full stop” in the UK. It is placed at the end of the sentence to indicate an end to that statement and a transition to a new one.

The Comma

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The comma is used to provide a bridge between very closely related statements or between sequences of incomplete statements. You’ve probably noticed that proper comma usage can be very tricky to master, and you’re not alone in that experience. We’ve covered some of the depths and complexities of comma usage in several posts, but for now what you need to know is this: the comma connects closely related thoughts, and the period separates finished, more-or-less unrelated thoughts.

The Semicolon

The other forms of breaking punctuation fall on a spectrum between the comma and the period. The semicolon is halfway between the two; it generally separates statements that could be broken into individual sentences, but which the author wants to be connected in the mind of the reader. Use it sparingly—it tends to create sentences that are very long and difficult to follow.

The Colon

The colon serves the specific purpose of introducing information; it can only be used if the text preceding it says something along the lines of, “I am going to tell you this.” So, for instance:

     Gary picked up all of the items on the list: a pickaxe, a jump rope, and—for some reason—a huge container of lard.
     This is what I was sent to tell you: that you must put an end to your company’s project, or your world will be destroyed.
     You have chosen the greatest hamburger of all: the Beefinator.

Remember: the colon should only be used if the text before it is somehow introducing the text that comes after it.

The Em Dash

The em dash is the jack of all trades. It swings back and forth between the comma and the semicolon and the colon. It can be used in place of a comma to provide a little more emphasis to the pause between related information, or in place of a semicolon to provide a little more connection between statements. It can also serve as a sort of weak colon, separating an initial statement from another that provides more connected or explanatory information. Often, I’ll simply use it to create variety when I’ve already used several commas or semicolons. But be careful about using it too much—the em dash is wide and easily noticeable, and a cluster of them in the same area of the page will tend to stand out garishly.



In summation, the comma is weakest form of breaking punctuation, used to separate closely related information; the semicolon separates weakly related or unrelated statements; the colon separates introductory text from the information it’s introducing; the em dash can serve as a strong comma, a weak colon, or a weak semicolon; and the period is the full stop that means that the previous statement is complete and we are moving on to something else.



P.S.
It may seem like there is considerable overlap between the uses for these breaking punctuation marks—that’s because there is. Often, you’ll be able to use either a period or a semicolon; in other cases, either a colon or a semicolon or an em dash would work. What punctuation you choose should depend on how connected you want the information it breaks apart to be, on how much you’ve already used each form of breaking punctuation, and on how you want the sentence or sentences to flow.  That is the reason for this post—to let you know how the breaking punctuation can be used, so that you know what your options are when you have more than one.

P.P.S.
If you want some helpful homework, go back over this post again and pay particular attention to the breaking punctuation. You’ll notice that I’ve used each form of breaking punctuation at some point, and in just about every way they can be used. Find each point where I’ve used a breaking punctuation mark, and make sure you understand why I chose that particular mark at that point in the text. Good luck!

Commas and Introductory Phrases

     Because he hated it when people came to his door Hermit Jones moved to an isolated cave in the mountains.

There is something missing from that sentence, and that something is a comma. It belongs between the introductory phrase and the rest of the sentence:

     Because he hated it when people came to his door, Hermit Jones moved to an isolated cave in the mountains.

How can you tell when a phrase is an “introductory phrase” rather than a normal beginning to a sentence? Well, first you need to know your basic sentence structure:

     SUBJECT      VERB     (sometimes optional) DIRECT OBJECT

        Callie           loves             those soft orange candy peanuts.

Most sentences begin with the subject of the sentence (and any adjectives used to describe them). If there is a complete phrase before the subject of the sentence, it is usually an introductory phrase that will need to be set apart by a comma. Introductory phrases usually describe the location, time, conditions, or reasons for the action taken by the sentence’s subject. So in our example above, Hermit Jones is the subject and moved is the verb. Everything before Hermit Jones is an introductory phrase describing his reason for moving, so it requires a comma to set it apart from the rest of the sentence.

Here’s some other examples:

      Before I get into the story, I should warn you that it is rather disturbing.

     Afraid of exposing herself to mockery, Dorothy decided not to try out for the cheerleading squad.

     To be perfectly honest, I don’t really understand the appeal of snowboarding.

     Lately, Georgina has seemed rather distressed and distant.

Now most of these examples have introductory phrases of several words, but take note of that last one. An introductory phrase can be as short as a single word. With such short introductory phrases, it isn’t uncommon to forgo a comma—I did it with “now” at the beginning of this paragraph, for example.

     Lately Georgina has seemed rather distressed and distant.

If you’re not sure whether or not it’s acceptable to leave out the comma between your short introductory phrase and the rest of the sentence, err on the side of caution and put the comma in.

The question of whether or not to include the introductory-phrase-comma is like the question of whether or not to bring food to a party: you might be okay if you don't, but you'll always be okay if you do.

Punctuation Problems: "While" and the Comma

A few months ago we discussed how a single comma can change the meaning of a sentence. But commas are more versatile than that; they can also change the meaning of specific words, simply by being placed nearby. For instance, the word while:

     We’ll go to the theatre while you watch the baby.

     I am a doctor of medicine, while you are simply a quack.

See that? In the first example, while meant “during the time that” and was not preceded by a comma. In the second example, it meant “whereas” and was preceded by a comma.

Now, it’s technically not the comma that changes the meaning of while. But that comma will pretty much always follow this pattern. If you’re using while to mean whereas, then it should be preceded by the comma; if you’re using it to mark a period of time, then there shouldn’t be a comma.

What I’m saying here is that editors don’t want to see this:

     He’s throwing a party, while his parents are out of town.

This happens all over the place, and it is incorrect. Resist the impulse to place a comma before a while that’s supposed to indicate a duration of time. Just don’t do it.

The problem with this error is that it still creates a grammatically valid sentence. A normal grammatical error just says something poorly, but at least it’s usually still what the writer meant to say. This error, on the other hand, completely changed the meaning of the sentence from this:

     He’s throwing a party during the period of time that his parents are out of town.

To this:

     He’s throwing a party; his parents, on the other hand, are out of town.

See the problem here? If you’re a writer, someone who makes a living (or wants to make a living) purely by the words you string together, then you need to know how to make those words say exactly what you intend them to. So remember:

Note: When while is being used to indicate a period of time, it is usually possible to switch the order of the sentence’s clauses like this:

     While his parents are out of town, he’s throwing a party.

In this case, you will need a comma between the two parts of the sentence, but not beside while.

Formatting for Publishing: Find and Replace

A subtle way to polish up your finished manuscript before sending it to a publisher is to do a few quick “find and replace” runs.  There are a lot of little formatting errors that crop up in a manuscript while you’re working—some are simple mis-types, some are the result of editing, and others can be the consequence of opening a document in multiple programs (Microsoft Word and Google Docs, for instance). Most of them can be easily fixed en masse.

Open the “Find and Replace” window by hitting Ctrl+H in Microsoft Word or Google Docs (command+shift+f and command+shift+h in their respective Mac versions). If you’ve never used “find and replace” before, it’s simple—whatever combination of characters you type in the first text box will be replaced by the combination of characters you put in the second text box. You can change each instance one at a time or all of them en masse.

Image from creativelycheap.com

A note of caution: it is very easy to create new errors with the mass “Replace All” option. For instance, say you’ve written a scene where one of the characters is using a pen. You decide afterward that you want them to be writing with a pencil instead, so you do a “Replace All” to replace the word pen with pencil. Unfortunately, the “Replace All” option has now substituted pencil for every instance of the letters pen. Open had now become opencil, pensive is now pencilsive, and so forth. So use this carefully.

Here are a few easy clean-ups that you can use to make your manuscript more presentable:

     Find:                                                       Replace with:

     Repeated spaces ([space][space])           Single space                      

If you need an indent, use paragraph formatting or tabs. Repeat this replacement until you get 0 results.

     Find:                                                       Replace with:

     Repeated paragraph breaks (^p^p)         Single paragraph break (^p)

Most “Find and Replace” features recognize a “carat p” (^p) as a formula representing a paragraph break. If you need space between paragraphs use the “add space after” feature in paragraph formatting. Repeat this replacement until you get 0 results.

     Find:                                                                    Replace with:

     Space at beginning of paragraph (^p[space])      Paragraph break (^p)

Or if you used tabs for the indents at the beginning of your paragraph:

     Find:                     Replace with:

     (^p^t[space])         (^p^t)

The ^t indicates a “tab” in most programs. This replace ensures that your paragraphs will all be aligned properly. If you’ve already replaced all of the repeated spaces, you shouldn’t have to run this replacement more than once.

     Find:                                                                       Replace with:

     Space at the end of a paragraph ([space]^p)          Paragraph break (^p)

This is very minor clutter, but there’s no reason to leave it.

     Find:                                                      Replace with:

     Repeated periods (..)                             Single period (.)

Note: if you format your ellipses as three periods (…), this will cause trouble. That’s one of the reasons I format my ellipses with spaces (. . .) instead. If you don’t have spaces in your ellipses, you’ll want to replace repeated periods one at a time (using “replace” and “find next” instead of “replace all”).

     Find:                                                    Replace with:

     Comma and period (,.) and (.,)            Comma (,) or period (.)

This is another that you’ll have to replace one at a time, since it’s the only way to ensure that you’re putting in the correct punctuation. Fortunately, there probably won’t be many of these in your manuscript. They usually crop up were a large section of a sentence was deleted but the old punctuation was missed.

     Find:                                         Replace with:

     Apostrophes ( ′ )                       Apostrophes ( ‘ )

Note the difference between those two apostrophes—one is straight, and one is curved. The straight apostrophe is an artifact of older typing programs or some non-text-focused programs that appears from time to time. If you’re using Word or Google Docs, however, the program will automatically replace each old-fashioned straight apostrophe with a curved one that faces the correct direction. (Note that you don’t have to hunt for an old straight apostrophe to put into your “find” box. Just put an apostrophe, and the program will figure it out.)

     Find:                                         Replace with:

     Quotation marks ( ″ )                Quotation marks ( “ )

    

Same thing—old-fashioned “double-prime” straight quotation marks should be replaced with curved ones.

     Find:                                          Replace with:

     Double hyphens (--)                  Em dash (—) or (^+)

Double hyphens aren’t actually proper punctuation—you’ll want an actual em dash in there instead.

     Find:                                         Replace with:

     Repeated tabs (^t^t)                  Single tab (^t)

Note: if you have used tabs as indentation, and you have any sections that indented further than the rest of the document (quoted passages, for instance), this could mess them up. It might be wise to replace these one at a time.

Now, I’m not saying any of these tips will get you published. They will, however, help you polish out a few common errors from your manuscript. This will result in a more professional-looking submission, which is an important step toward getting published. Good luck!

Punctuation Problems: Separating Subjects From Verbs

If you have been reading the Story Polisher for a while now, you may have noticed that an understanding of the basic parts of the sentence is something I consider very useful (if not essential) for a writer. I try to explain things in such a way that you don’t need to know what a present participle is, much less the exact difference between it and a gerund. I don’t believe that you need to know and remember every grammatical term.

However, you do need to know the central, most basic parts of the sentence: the subject, the verb, and the direct object. So many of the errors that I explain here depend on your knowing these three things. The subject is the primary noun of the sentence, the person or thing that is performing an action. The verb is the action they are performing. The direct object is who or what they are doing something to (and isn’t always necessary for a complete sentence). Each of these parts of the sentence can be a single word:

     Katy       kissed       Gunther.

   Subject      Verb      Direct Object

Or a phrase:

     The red-haired little girl       has read       my favorite book.

                  Subject                       Verb             Direct Object

The ability to identify these three elements in any sentence you read or write is integral to being a good writer. There are so many errors that cannot be avoided if you don’t know where these three parts of the sentence are. For example, take this post that I saw going around Facebook and Twitter on December 31^st:

The problem with this example is simple: that comma should not be there. How do we know? Because it separates the subject of the sentence (Tomorrow) from its verb (is). There are almost no situations where this is permissible. But if you don’t know how to find your subject and verb, then this error will keep popping up.

This error is particularly common in sentences with a long, complex subject. For example:

     The boy that I’d had a crush on for the entire semester, had just given me a rose.

In that example, everything before the comma is the subject of the sentence. Many writers, when faced with such a long subject, feel like there should be a comma somewhere in the sentence. The writers who know how to identify their subjects and verbs, however, know that there should (almost) never be a comma in that part of the sentence. So make sure you always know where your subjects and verbs are—it could save your sentence someday.

P.S.

The only truly common exception to this rule is when you have a clarifying phrase, set apart by commas, between the subject and the verb. Here are some examples (two of which are from the paragraph above this one):

     My parents, Diana and Clark, want to talk to you.

     Many writers, when faced with such a long subject, feel like there should be a comma somewhere in the sentence.

     The writers who know how to identify their subjects and verbs, however, know that there should (almost) never be a comma in that part of the sentence.

If you remember from this post, a phrase that is set apart in this manner—be it with commas, em dashes, or parentheses—should be able to be removed from the sentence without rendering it illegible. That is, if you took the italicized phrases out of the examples above, they would still be whole sentences:

     My parents want to talk to you.

     Many writers feel like there should be a comma somewhere in the sentence.

     The writers who know how to identify their subjects and verbs know that there should (almost) never be a comma in that part of the sentence.

These commas serve to create an interjection, not a pause or break, and will always come in pairs. If you’re not inserting some sort of clarifying information, you probably shouldn’t have any commas between your subject and your verb.

P.P.S.

This rule applies to other breaking punctuation as well: there should generally not be any em dashes, semi-colons, colons, or periods separating your subject from your verb.

Punctuation Problems: Clarifying Information vs. Additional Information

Can you tell me the difference in meaning between these two sentences?

     1. Olya entered the chapel and approached the altar where Dima knelt with his wife.

     2. Olya entered the chapel and approached the altar, where Dima knelt with his wife.

The only difference is the comma—what does that little comma do? It separates the sentence into two portions, which serves to inform the reader that the second portion of the sentence is adding some extra information. The comma, in essence, informs the reader that the second part of the sentence is not necessary to understand the first part.

Without the comma, the sentence implies that that last portion of the sentence (“where Dima knelt with his wife”) is clarifying the first part, that the sentence wouldn’t be complete without it. If that last portion of the sentence is necessary, then that implies that the “altar” that was mentioned needs to be distinguished from some other altar in the area.

In other words, here is what each of our example sentences above is really saying:

     1. Olya entered the chapel. There were several altars, and she approached the one where Dima knelt with his wife.

     2. Olya entered the chapel and approached the only altar. Dima knelt beside the altar with his wife.

See the difference? Without the comma, the implication is that the second portion of the sentence is necessary to clarify the first portion. With the comma, the implication is that the second portion of the sentence is extra information which isn’t needed to understand the first portion.

Imagine that you and a friend are headed to the movies, when you get a call that you need to stop and meet a secret agent to receive a package related to your next secret agent mission. (We’re all imagining that you have a very interesting life.) You tell your friend that you have to stop to meet this agent at the park.

Now, how you phrase this statement would depend on how many parks are in the area, right? If there were only one park in the whole town, then you might simply say:

     “We have to stop at the park.”

Since there’s only one park in the area, your friend would know what you mean. However, if there were several parks in the area, you would need to add additional information to clarify which park you meant:

     “We have to stop at the park where you met my sister.”

See how it works? The phrase “where you met my sister” serves as clarification—without that information, it would not be clear which park you meant. Since the information is necessary, it should not be separated from the noun it clarifies (park) by a comma. If you did so, the sentence would read strangely:

     “We have to stop at the park, where you met my sister.”

Placing a comma here implies that you are adding extra information, which in this case seems rather nonsensical. Why would you mention, apropos of nothing, that your friend met your sister in the park? Your friend would know that. With the comma, the sentence essentially means this:

     “We have to stop at the park. By the way, you met my sister at this park.”

That just reads like particularly awkward maid-and-butler dialog. Imagine your friend looking at you in confusion, and saying, “Yeah, I know that. Why are you telling me?”

Remember: clarifying information should usually not be separated from the word it clarifies by a comma.

     

On Commas and Splicing

Commas.

Do you have trouble figuring out when to place a comma in your sentence and when not to? Good; that means you pass the Turing test—you’re human. There are a lot of ways to use commas and a lot of ways to misuse commas. Many of those uses and misuses can be difficult to explain clearly, which is why I’ve waited so long to broach the subject. But in my recent reading and editing I have been coming across so many misused commas that I figure it’s about time to jump in and address some of these issues. Starting with:

The Comma Splice

A comma splice is when you have two independent clauses (i.e. two complete sentences) joined by a comma. For the purposes of this column, we’re going to consider it a form of run-on sentence. Here’s an example of a comma splice:

     I won’t make it to the meeting tonight, you will need to hand out assignments.

See how this is really two sentences? Each clause has its own subject performing its own action (“I won’t” and “you will,” respectfully) and so could stand perfectly well on its own. If you remember from the post on breaking punctuation, the comma is used to separate closely-related information. As a general rule, if you have two clauses with distinct subjects and verbs, those clauses should not be separated by a comma.

If there's anything that the media has taught us, it's that splicing is bad.

Simply removing the comma won’t fix the problem:

     I won’t make it to the meeting tonight you will need to hand out assignments.

That’s still a run-on sentence. The problem can be fixed, however, by changing out the comma for other punctuation or by adding some clarifying words:

     I won’t make it to the meeting tonight; you will need to hand out assignments.

     I won’t make it to the meeting tonight—you will need to hand out assignments.

     I won’t make it to the meeting tonight. You will need to hand out assignments.

     I won’t make it to the meeting tonight, so you will need to hand out assignments.

     Since I won’t make it to the meeting tonight, you will need to hand out assignments.

     I won’t make it to the meeting tonight, which means you will need to hand out assignments.

Just remember: if both clauses can stand as sentences, they’ll probably something more than a comma to connect them.

However

One of the trickiest things about comma splices is that they’re not always a bad thing.

 

Wait, yes they are.

Well-versed, reputable authors will use them all the time. They're all over the place. For instance, you may be familiar with this famous quote from Julius Caeser:

     I came, I saw, I conquered.

That right there is three distinct clauses, each with a subject and a verb, separated by a pair of comma splices. Even the picky Strunk and White noted that splices are sometimes acceptable when the clauses are short and similar in form.

     The door slammed shut, the lights went out, the air went cold.

Comma splices are especially easy to justify in dialog or in poetic writing, as they can help mimic the cadences of spoken language more clearly than other punctuation might.

So if comma splices aren’t always bad, how do we determine when to use them? Well, if you’re looking to submit to an editor, I recommend playing it safe and just avoiding them. In her excellent book Eats, Shoots & Leaves, Lynne Truss says, “so many highly respected writers observe the splice comma that a rather unfair rule emerges on this one: only do it if you're famous. Done knowingly by an established writer, the comma splice is effective, poetic, dashing. Done equally knowingly by people who are not published writers, it can look weak or presumptuous. Done ignorantly by ignorant people, it is awful.”

If that seems unfair, well . . . comma splices really can be awful if you’re not absolutely sure what you’re doing. It’s the old “you have to know the rules before you can break them” advice. In my opinion, you’re better off avoiding comma splices until you, your editors, and your audience are all confident that you know what you’re doing.

P.S.

Somewhere out in our audience there is someone who read that advice and said something along the lines of, “Bah! You don’t get published by playing it safe! You have to experiment, share your soul, be bold and daring!” I have two things to say to that reader.

First: that was actually a pretty decent use of comma splices in that last sentence of yours. Good job.

Second: you are wrong. Oh, your sentiment is good—go out there and experiment and be bold and daring. More power to you. But that sentiment does not apply to grammar. It doesn’t apply to the basics of solid prose. Experiment with your plot, share your soul through your characters, and be bold and daring with your themes and content. But learn to write all of that in a clear, legible, and simple manner. Learning to write correctly will get you closer to being published than all the creativity that you can muster. 

In other words—there is no comma splice that is so bold and daring that it will get you published. But if you let comma splices make a mess of your writing, it just may keep you from getting published. Play it safe and don’t let that happen.

Punctuation in Parenthetical Phrases

 A parenthetical phrase is a short statement inserted into the main body of a sentence to give additional information. It is usually set apart from the rest of the sentence by means of commas, em dashes, or parentheses. Some examples:

1. John, my oldest brother, came to see me in the hospital yesterday.
2. The floor was made of stone—or at least it looked and felt like stone—and was freezing cold beneath his feet.
3. She made me pelmeni (a type of Russian dumpling) and baked potatoes for dinner.

The punctuation you should use depends on the necessity and importance of the information you’re inserting. If the information you’re adding is necessary for the reader to understand the sentence, or at least very helpful, then you’ll want to use commas. If the information is important but not actually necessary, or if it doesn’t flow too well with the rest of the sentence—as in the case of example two above—then you should generally use em dashes. If the information is extremely superfluous or disconnected from the rest of the sentence, then you’ll use parentheses.

As was the case with breaking punctuation in this post, there is often more than one possible choice when you’re deciding which punctuation to use with your parenthetical phrase. Which punctuation you use will usually depend on how strongly you want to connect the parenthetical to the rest of the sentence.

Setting apart a parenthetical phrase with em dashes is also a useful tool if the sentence already contains several commas, or if the parenthetical phrase itself contains commas. For example, this sentence:

• Whenever I went to the theater, I would always invite the group, consisting of John, Mandy, and Gus, so that I wouldn't have to sit alone.

reads a little bit more clearly like this:

• Whenever I went to the theater, I would always invite the group—consisting of John, Mandy, and Gus—so that I wouldn't have to sit alone.

Parentheses can also be used in these cases, but be wary about using them too often in fiction. Generally, you should avoid parentheses in your story unless a narrator with a strong personality is speaking—usually in either first-person or third-person omniscient perspective. Even then, parentheses should be used rarely.

Punctuation Problems: Breaks

There is a set of punctuation marks that are used to separate thoughts in writing, which I like to refer to as Breaking Punctuation. They are the comma ( , ), the em dash ( — ), the semicolon ( ; ), the colon ( : ), parentheses ( ), and the period ( . ). Each of these has a subtly different meaning from the others, which we’re going to break down here.

The Period

The period is the ultimate and strongest form of breaking punctuation, which is why it’s known as a “full stop” in the UK. It is placed at the end of the sentence to indicate an end to that statement and a transition to a new one.

The Comma

The comma, on the other hand, is used to provide a bridge between very closely related statements or between sequences of incomplete statements. You’ve probably noticed that proper comma usage can be very tricky to master, and you’re not alone in that experience. We’ll cover the full depths and complexities of comma usage in another post (or several posts), but for now just remember: the comma connects closely related thoughts, and the period separates finished, more-or-less unrelated thoughts.

The Semicolon

The other forms of breaking punctuation fall on a spectrum between the comma and the period. The semicolon is halfway between the two; it generally separates statements that could be broken into individual sentences, but which the author wants to be connected in the mind of the reader. Use it sparingly—it tends to create sentences that are very long and difficult to follow.

The Colon

The colon serves the specific purpose of introducing information; it can only be used if the text preceding it says something along the lines of, “I am going to tell you this.” So, for instance:

Gary picked up all of the items on the list: a pickaxe, a jump rope, and—for some reason—a huge container of lard.
This is what I was sent to tell you: that you must put an end to your company’s project, or your world will be destroyed.
You have chosen the greatest hamburger of all: the Beefinator.

Remember: the colon should only be used if the text before it is somehow introducing the text that comes after it.

The Em Dash

The em dash is the jack of all trades. It swings back and forth between the comma and the semicolon and the colon. It can be used in place of a comma to provide a little more emphasis to the pause between related information, or in place of a semicolon to provide a little more connection between statements. It can also serve as a sort of weak colon, separating an initial statement from another that provides more connected or explanatory information. Often, I’ll simply use it to create variety when I’ve already used several commas or semicolons. But be careful about using it too much—the em dash is wide and easily noticeable, and a cluster of them in the same area of the page will tend to stand out garishly.



We’ll discuss each of these punctuation marks in more depth in later posts; we’ll also discuss parentheses and parenthetical statements. For now, simply remember that breaking punctuation separates thoughts and statements: the comma is weakest, separating closely related information; the semicolon separates weakly related or unrelated statements; the colon separates introductory text from the information it’s introducing; the em dash can serve as a strong comma, a weak colon, or a weak semicolon; and the period is the full stop that means that the previous statement is complete and we are moving on to something else.



P.S.
It may seem like there is considerable overlap between the uses for these breaking punctuation marks—that’s because there is. Often, you’ll be able to use either a period or a semicolon; in other cases, either a colon or a semicolon or an em dash would work. What punctuation you choose should depend on how connected you want the information it breaks apart to be, on how much you’ve already used each form of breaking punctuation, and how you want the sentence or sentences to flow. That is the reason for this post—to let you know how the breaking punctuation can be used, so that you know what your options are when you have more than one.

P.P.S.
If you want some helpful homework, go back over this post again and pay particular attention to the breaking punctuation. You’ll notice that I’ve used each form of breaking punctuation at some point, and in just about every way they can be used. Find each point where I’ve used a breaking punctuation mark, and make sure you understand why I chose that particular mark at that point in the text. Good luck!

Dialog Tags: Periods vs. Commas

A dialog tag is the bit of prose that identifies who is speaking. Consider these two examples:

Example 1: "Eat some food," she said, pushing him toward the kitchen, "before you pass out."

Example 2: "Eat some food," she said, pushing him toward the kitchen. "I don't want you to pass out."

In example one, the dialog tag ends in a comma, while in example two, the tag ends with a period. Why?

Look at the dialog from example one without the tag: "Eat some food before you pass out." It is one complete sentence, and the tag was placed in the middle. When a dialog tag bisects a sentence, then it should end with a comma, to keep the sentence intact.

Example two, however, has a dialog tag between two complete sentences, so the tag ends with a period.

It is also worth noting that ending a dialog tag with a period is preferable whenever possible. Consider one more example:

Example 3: "Eat some food," she said, pushing him toward the kitchen. "Then get some rest."

This example could be written as one sentence in several different ways. "Eat some food, then get some rest," or "Eat some food; then get some rest," would both be as grammatically correct as "Eat some food. Then get some rest." But with a dialog tag, a period usually flows best, so go with it whenever you can.

Dialog Tags: Capitalization

A dialog tag is the bit of prose that identifies who is speaking. If the tag follows the dialog, it should begin with a lower-case letter, unless it is a title or name which is always capitalized. The punctuation of the dialog (i.e. whether the dialog ended in a comma, a question mark, or anything else) has no effect on capitalization.

Examples:

Incorrect:  “I’m doing fine,” She said.

Correct:    “I’m doing fine,” she said.

Incorrect:  “What do we do now?” The man said.

Correct:    “What do we do now?” the man said.

Incorrect:  “Hi there!” She said.

Correct:    “Hi there!” Sarah said.